Stumptown Graffiti Wall

Archives: 2006 - 2007

Welcome to the Stumptown Graffiti Wall Archives
By viewing this page you agree you are over 21 years of age.

[1997 - 2001] | [2002 - 2003] | [2004 - 2005] | [2006 - 2007] | [2008 - Current]

G-Town, CA USA - Tuesday, December 18, 2007 at 13:45:43 (PST)

We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below.

"GUTS" is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say,
"Are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"

"BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, "You're next!

We hope this clears up any confusion, "A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose."

USA - Friday, June 01, 2007 at 19:34:11 (PDT)

yesterday i got really drunk and then floated home in my innertube. i forgot my smokes were in my pocket and they got wet.

i like that i don't have to drive home when drinking here.

i just put my innertube in the river and float home.

one time i passed out though and woke up in duncans mills.

guerneville, ca USA - Thursday, May 24, 2007 at 14:53:48 (PDT)

BBQ and BEER!!! MORE INFO NOW Ya Rat Bastards!!!
San Leandro, CA USA - Wednesday, May 23, 2007 at 13:38:28 (PDT)

We had to go all the way to California WINE COUNTRY for real beer... any chance you'll franchise (to Florida)? You guys rock!!!
St. Pete Beach , FL USA - Thursday, March 29, 2007 at 14:33:52 (PDT)

Subject: Fw: Hell Explained


The following is an actual question given on a Washington
State University chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, viathe Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure ofenjoying it as well:

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs oftheir beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in
time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving intoHell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we cansafely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.

Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are
entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in theworld today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a
member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order
for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at
which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase
of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will dropuntil Hell freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by
Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day inHell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that Islept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. Thecorollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, itfollows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore,extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa keptshouting "Oh my God."


g-ville, USA - Saturday, January 27, 2007 at 08:24:28 (PST)

"A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her."
-W.C. Fields

"I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer."
-Homer Simpson

"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
-Humphrey Bogart

"Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me."
-Winston Churchill

"If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose."
-Deep Thought, Jack Handy

"Everybody has to believe in something.....I believe I'll have another drink."
-W.C. Fields

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
-Benjamin Franklin

"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut."
-Ernest Hemmingway

"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."
-Dean Martin

"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
-Frank Sinatra

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
-Henny Youngman

"Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time."
-Catherine Zandonella

"You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer."
-Frank Zappa
Rio, CA USA - Wednesday, November 08, 2006 at 18:22:45 (PST)

Contrary to popular belief I WAS wearing panties under those mini's.
miss g-ville, ca USA - Saturday, November 04, 2006 at 14:46:33 (PST)

What a great place! It's full of interesting people (Jim,Montana and Nick to name a few) great Beer (Boney finger...yum!) and lots of fun.

Vacaville, CA USA - Monday, October 23, 2006 at 12:46:53 (PDT)

What a great event you have organized!
I had a great time and will be back in the future with friends.
Duncan's Mills, Ca USA - Thursday, August 24, 2006 at 11:22:54 (PDT)

This is a link to a photo gallery from the Russian River Beer Revival - we had an awewome time!!!
Sacramento, Ca USA - Thursday, August 24, 2006 at 11:18:49 (PDT)

The smell of a musty pool table and hops of new brews.
The red tint of light in the safe darkness of sarcastic jabs and laughter.
Grey layers of dust gently rest upon braziers that once touched nipples of
past patrons.
Crispy photos with curled edges of moments documented.
Pounding of glass 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 as pints with tiny reminisce of the latest
craze swirls with a brown hew of an herbal concoction.
Do not ask the bartender for a cool glass of tap or you may be jeered and
Smiling lips untouched by gloss cradle the purple teeth of organic women
sipping a $3.50 glass of fermented grapes.
The fine soil of the river banks cake the wet fur of panting pups waiting
cheerfully for their best friend to take the last swig of brew.
Bellowing of smoke on the patio and smothering shells of butts that had
earlier played the part in passionate conversations of politics and beliefs.
This is where you find a head on your beer, cigs for sale and the best damn
burgers in town.
This is Stumptown Brewery.

Justanother Bartender
Everywhere, USA - Monday, August 07, 2006 at 12:47:07 (PDT)

Stumptown Brewery, The best bar in the world! Blue Gringo Forever!
Bryan Cooper
Fremont, ca USA - Saturday, February 25, 2006 at 12:30:15 (PST)

Those are the best Chuck Norris jokes ever.
Colfax, CA USA - Friday, January 06, 2006 at 00:16:20 (PST)

Hallo Stumptown, leider kann ich zu wenig englisch um mich zu verständigen, ich hoffe ihr könnt das übersetzen. Wie ihr seht heisse ich wie eure Stadt, das ist kein Scherz. Vielleicht sind meine Urahnen nach Amerika ausgewandert und haben sich bei euch niedergelassen, wer weiss. Da ich zu wenig englisch beherrsche, kann ich aus dem Text nicht ausfindig machen wie die Stadt zu dem Namen kam. Könntet ihr eine Erklärung auf deutsch hinzufügen, in der Schweiz gibts viele Stumps.
I wish you a happy new Year an good Luck

Fabio Stump
Felben, CH TG - Thursday, January 05, 2006 at 09:24:50 (PST)

Stumptown ist ein name (jargon) für eine alte loggenstadt (Stumpfstadt)

[1997 - 2001] | [2002 - 2003] | [2004 - 2005] | [2006 - 2007] | [2008 - Current]
[Add to Graffiti Wall]
Home: Access Key [0]